Forever Young

Frustrated blogger.
Hi Ed. :)

Hi Ed. :)


First and foremost, it’s not you. It’s me. I’m telling you, everyone’s beautiful in their own way except for me ‘cause I’m having a  hard time managing my self-esteem and I just don’t know how to fix it. But that’s not really a problem for me because I know God has given me so much more than just physical beauty. At least I’m trying to be positive at this very moment (insert smiley here).  I did not write this for you to feel bad about yourself but for you to know how I’m exactly feeling even if you don’t really care. But I’d like to share this anyway (for your future reference).

Tell you what, I’m not the prettiest girl in the campus yet I have high standards for the people I want to be with in my life. Oops. You probably think that I’m picky with friends. No, I’m not. I would actually prefer simple persons in my life —- persons whom I can laugh or cry with, persons whom I can trust, persons whom I can share secrets with or persons whom I can enjoy common interests with. I don’t require popular people to be my friends (unless they want to, but I guess they’d never) . I have so much precious friends in my life now and it will be a blessing if you will be counted as one. I’ve already wasted so much ink yet I haven’t told you what aspect of my life have I set high standards. Well, believe it or not, I have my checklist for the characteristics of my future partner in life. And at this early point in my life, I’m already searching for him. You’ve read it right. Searching. I’m looking for the possible candidates since I’m college now and I’m not getting any younger and I know I’m going to be married someday.

I haven’t found the one who completes my high-end list. ‘Cause if I’ve found the one, I might have stopped schooling (just kidding!). Most of the guys lack two or more qualities from my list. Maybe that’s why they end up as my crushes (take note of the plurality: crushES). Probably, my protype of a lifetime partner is similar to any other girls. We usually call it the “dream guy”. That dream guy should be God-fearing, family-oriented, street-smart, humble, humorous, kinda sulky, a bit weird, slightly quiet and secretive, a bit chatty and naughty, matured, optimistic, honest, fun-loving, sweet, professional, bubbly, adventurous, supportive, serious at times, composed, nerdy and ladylike. I would love someone who’s an achiever, someone who can sing, dance or play musical instruments, someone who stands for what he believes in, someone who knows when to give up or admit that he’s wrong, someone who respects me and my loved ones as well, someone who’s got principle not pride and someone who will love me for who I am and is brave enough to fight for me. So far, those are the makings of my future partner in life. I’m planning to add more. It is not really as high as you think, is it? Kidding. My crushes possess some of those assets I’ve mentioned and I just want to thank them because they’ve truly been my inspiration. They are like the forces that motivate me to go to school every day. They don’t only drive me crazy but they drive me to do my best in everything that I do.

Again, I certainly know that I’m not beautiful but it doesn’t deprive me the right to actually choose the person that defines my so-called “high standards.” I’ve been working hard since grade school and I don’t want to waste my sacrifices and success with someone who does not deserve at all. As Miss Universe 2011 3rd Runner-Up Shamcey Supsup says, “Never settle for anything less than what you want and what you deserve.” Ever since I’ve heard her advice, I’ve been holding on to it and I believe that you might as well take time to ponder about it. Just think about all the things you have accomplished and see for yourself what you really be worthy of. My standards might screw up someday but mind you, I will never apologize for having high standards because people who wants to be in my life will rise up to meet them. :)

— Katrezia Fiel


"Everybody stares as she walks by, ‘cause they can see the flame that’s in her eyes. Watch her when she’s lighting up the night. Nobody knows that she’s a lonely girl. And it’s a lonely world.."

It has always been my dream to perform in front of a huge crowd. But the stage fright was never lost. It was a sudden hit on the first note which I guess ruined the act. I was still happy. Seeing how people cheered and supported me. I had an awesome group of audience. “Girl on Fire” was the best song that really speaks who I am. I wanted to be remembered like Katniss Everdeen and it’s pretty safe to say that it quite came true.

I don’t care what people have to say about me. It’s about me doing what I love and how I sing my heart out.